Random stuff heard around the house

Archive for April, 2011

Extreme Couponing Conversation

So we were watching Extreme Couponing on TLC and …

Rich: What are they going to do with all of that stuff?

Me: Well, if there was a zombie apocalypse they would need all that food.

Rich: You can’t eat razors and stuff.

Me: There’s food in those stockpiles and they’ll need it.

Rich: What they’ll need is guns. Besides, the neighbors will all break in and steal their stuff.

Me: You’re probably right.

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Math Conversations

Rich: This camera is $699. Lens is $250 and the bag is $52.  That’s $1002.97. If you buy it as a package it’s $779.97

(What I heard: wa wah wah wah wah like that teacher on Peanuts)

Me: That’s a lot of math for me to consider.

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WWYD Conversation

We were in Target tonight and the kid two carts in front of us was throwing a fit. I guess he was with his grandmother because another girl gets out of another line and pushes the people in front of us out of the way to pick up the kid and freak out on him.

Me: If she’d pushed me out of the way like that it’d have totally been a What Would You Do moment except I’d have gone off on her and kicked her ass. (now I wouldn’t have really kicked her ass but believe me if she’d pushed me out of the way she’d have gotten my two cents.)

Speaking of that, it was like kid tantrum night. We had gone to Sam’s Club earlier and all these kids were screaming then in Target the kid I was talking about made the kid in front of us start screaming because he was screaming. It was like a daycare nightmare. I have to admit the little baby in front of us was adorable but because of that one kid he just bunched up his face and let loose.

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Winning Conversation

Tonight during Modern Family the new Pepsi commercial came on.

Me: Hey, I’ve been wanting to see this one. It has Sofia Vergara and David Beckham. You get her and I get him. It’s a win/win situation!

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Taking Care of Business Conversation

We were headed back home after getting coffee and I had on the 70’s station on Sirius.  That song Taking Care of Business by Bachman Turner Overdrive came on and Rich starts swerving the truck back and forth a tiny bit. No one was around.

Me: (when an officer pulls you over) Do you realize why I pulled you over, son?

Me: (as Rich) Cause Bachman Turner Overdrive came on?

Rich: Cause you be taking care of business?

I almost spit out my coffee!


Computer Conversations

Rich: How do you make MSN it’s own thing?

Me: What?

Rich: Like if I have AOL and I have Firefox and I want Bing to work how do I do that with MSN?

Me: I haven’t a clue what you are talking about.

Rich: Listen to me, if I want Bing on MSN as a search how do I do that?

Me: What in the heck are you talking about?

Rich: I don’t want it on Firefox, I want it its own thing.

Me:…………

Rich: You’re not listening.

Me: You’re not making a lick of sense. MSN is a site, put it in your favorites. Bing is a search engine. Firefox is a browser. You are comparing apples and squash or something.

He finally figured out what he wanted to do but for me, I still haven’t a clue. I think he has IE as a browser with MSN as a home page and Bing as his search engine. Then Firefox as a browser and Comcast as that home page and Google as a search engine. And he has AOL. I am confused but as long as it works for him I guess it doesn’t matter if I get it or not.

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Sports Conversation

We were talking about my BIL and SIL that are at a Yankees game.

Me: I’d love to see the Yankees play but I don’t want to stay the whole time because baseball games are like 6 hours. I saw a Braves game before but we walked around and stuff too.

Rich: They are not 6 hours long, where’d you heard that?

Me: They are if they go into overtime or something.

Rich: Baseball does not go into overtime, dumba**.

Me: Oh wait, never mind. I wasn’t thinking. But they are still long!

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Pool Conversation

Me: We need to work on the pool, it’s getting very hot outside. Can you get something to go in it?

Rich: It needs draining, nothing is going to fix that.

Me: Okay, do I just drain it or do you have to go inside of it?

Rich: Just pop the drains, no way am I going inside of that now. It might have alligators, snakes and swamp monsters in it now.

On a side note, I can’t wait to have it up and running again. However, that may day a few days since it has to be drained, cleaned, refilled and chemicals added.

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Potato/Potatter Conversation

This conversation happened a year or two ago between Rich and a friend of ours. If said friend reads this, know that it’s all in good fun.

Friend: Our dog Tater is lost.

Rich: Oh no! Did you call the animal control or the pound?

Friend: Yes we did but they don’t have a dog named Tater.

Fast forward a few days later.

Rich: I would go down there and see for myself.

Later that day.

Friend: We found Tater!

Rich: That’s great, why didn’t they tell you they had them.

Friend: His tag said Tatter. They didn’t know it was the same dog.

Me: ………………

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Crazy numbers conversation

I was talking to Rich because I called Carnival about our refund for our shore excursion that we had to cancel. They told me we had been refunded on March 11th, which I never saw.

Me: I check the bank every day and I never saw that deposit but sure enough, there it was.

Rich: Well, at least we go it. Doesn’t your checkbook not balance now?

Me: Well, I added in the refund amount and it is correct now. I just don’t see how I didn’t see that. I think it’s because when I look at numbers they look all crazy to me.

Rich: …………

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